I can feel the anger emanating from some mothers. Listen to me out.
My mom is an Baby Boomer. She was born into a society where mothers staying at in the home with their children was the standard (which is still the case in most countries to be honest) and mothers who had working while children were babysitters was a bit unusual. Her generation was against this idea. They wanted to be treated as an equal partner in the financial provision their families. They wanted to be able to pursue a career and excel in their chosen fields without having to endure primitive notions about motherhood.
We're all the beneficiaries of this time. I'm not sure I'd be in this position in the first place if not for the radical shift away from the traditional motherhood duties. It's a lie to claim that I don't enjoy the privilege of choosing what and when my family expands, and also how my job can be a part of it.
Humans are funny, however. We self-correct but without the anchor of faith and tradition (two fundamental elements of human development) we're destined to overcorrect and we've done this. The effort to give acceptance of the concept of homosexuality has gotten us to the point where that we're now in where we are forced to believe that boys can be girls, and the reverse is true. The struggle for equality in race has overcorrected itself to the new segregation that is embodied in the critical race theory. The trend toward “believe all women” has become a synonym for, nearly everywhere (save Johnny Depp, who's charm appears to make him the most famous of everyone else) “never believe a man.”
Today, we are in a time where the simple demand for women to work outside of the home has become an attitude of shame for women who would rather remain in their homes. When politicians speak of support for women, they talk about ways we can assist more women get working. They never ask how we could help women to stay at home and take care of their families. We seem to have dropped this idea completely.
I had the pleasure of speaking to one of my neighbors, a young mother of four who lives at home. of four. She complained at me that she was being a little unfulfilling as a parent. She wanted to go back to earning some kind of income. She was not feeling as if she was a valuable contributing member of the family. It hurt my heart. Generations like hers have had the unfortunate misfortune of being immersed in the ever-growing notion that the only true contribution to a successful society is a profession of some sort. We teach our daughters throughout their education that they can do whatever they like – scientists, engineers, doctors, or even Vice Presidents. Nobody within their lives whispers to them that they can be mothers who stay at in their homes and take care of your own kids.
We've created a false notion of value for women such as my lovely neighbor. She was able to consider her worth by the amount of money she earns, as nobody around her was offering the praise or encouragement she needs for the sacrifices she's made to be at in her home with her family. Every aspect of our culture…every thing…is focused on promoting how we can support the mother working as well as the single mother that is, in reality, identical. Single mothers are strong, tough and ardent (and they are definitely in some cases). Married mothers are not a part of the public discourse. If we do, we're often the object of ridicule. We're accused of not showcasing our privilege. Nobody ever praises married mothers with the courage to do so. How do we take in this?
Naturally I told my girlfriend that she's seeing the world through a filter that is dirty. The husband isn't able to bring the kids to medical appointments, playdates and sports. He's not able spend all day caring for them, taking them to school functions, and making bandages for scrapes. The most important thing to him is, obviously his family. The things she is doing at home helps him feel secure and comfortable working and earning a living so that she can continue doing the things she loves for her children. Parents may be comfortable when they leave their children at an all-day day care. The husband is not. What can she contribute to be more significant as a wife and mother? She does everything she can to make sure that their children are always with at most one person who cares the most for them.
What happens to dads? Should they be able to stay at in their homes? Sure! One of my best acquaintances is a father who stays home and a very excellent one at that; however, he'll say that he's an exception, not the normal. However, the concept is exactly the same. His wife and he saw the importance of making sure that their children wouldn't be forced to spend all of their childhood with someone who was not their own.
This isn't to make a statement about women who does not do the stay-at-home thing. My mother didn't get that chance, and most women I know do not. Some prefer this, while others are forced into work due to abuse or betrayal. Whatever the reasons you have them, they're yours. Nobody loves your children as much as you. If you believe you've have made the right decision and you're not at all offended by my opinions. You'll be able to understand my argument.
The point I am trying to make is this: ladies should, if possible remain at home, do so with your kids. Motherhood is the most fulfilling vocation and I'm regretting that we've allowed our ever-changing world to diminish the benefits of having a family. It is not an failure if you don't have a job outside of your home. You're, in fact brave for doing this extremely exhausting job every single day. I'm sorry, but no one says that anymore.
Making this portion of life all about family isn't a sentence. The birthday of my son is this week and I'm able to say that from my perspective this moment the time we spent together in our home was gone in the flash of an eye. There is no way to be able to recreate the first few years with your kids. These little moments that are lost when you're in the office all day…there aren't any reruns. Additionally, kids are able to start school quickly, and after that you'll have more time to pursue your own hobbies if you're interested. Don't let your precious moments of motherhood in exchange for the sake of a concept that's simply an overcorrection to the initial base.
Your kids will be grateful to them for your kindness. They won't ever be able to say, “I wish my mom was home less.” Never.
In recent times, as my professional life has begun to grow more intense since my children have become more mature, our son has told me that he was always happy knowing that I'd be there waiting at home for him after he got home from school. It was a sense of security that he was unable to communicate as a child.
Do we ever wish that you had more? More time off? More luxuries? A bigger home? Yes. We're blood-red American capitalists after all!
Are we ever regretting giving up these things in order to educate our children in the security of our house for many years?
Never. You won't either. If you are able, stay at home with your kids. If you aren't able to, let us all strive for the day when more women can be able to do so, and not be branded women who aren't able to do the same.