Self-declared “lefty” Bill Burr has issued a statement that's bound to rile up many Americans who are on his side of the line. He admitted to it in passing, but it will not likely excuse him from the backlash. In his “Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast,” the comedian weighed in on government control generally and specifically on abortion. In his monologue–intentionally or not–the speaker swung and threw his way through transgenderism.
In the words of the podcaster, while reading an online headline: “’Democratic Witness Tells House Committee Men Can Get Pregnant and Have Abortions.’ Um, alright. I don't really need to click on that.”
Burr was confused. “What do you mean, men can get pregnant? What the [heck] are they talking about? This is like, this is just, as a lefty, I don't understand.”
To his way of thinking, this is a radical notion. “Well, you know what? It is the extreme Left. You know what I mean? … Like, I would never call in sports talk radio. I guess I'm glad people do. I'm glad there's people that go before the…Senate or whatever, a House committee…and tell them a man can get pregnant.”
Bill looked into the theory before coming to his personal, controversial conclusion: “A man cannot get pregnant.” He even went on to bolster his claims. “We're not born into a mother's womb…?”
A statement like this would at one time have been a welcome consensus from everyone on Earth. However, in these times, according to some, things have changed. Bill is challenging a belief that nearly everyone with a high profile today claims to hold. “A man can get pregnant” is an institution-wide fact: “Calvin Klein Salutes Mothers, Including a Pregnant Man Who Doesn't Look Like a Woman,” “Chief Medical Officer Contacts Black as well as Puerto Rican ‘Mothers,' Department of Health Apologizes for the ‘Gender-Based' Discrimination,” “New Smartphone Emojis Could Include an ‘Unborn Man,’” “Hospitals Are Beginning to Ask Men If They're Expecting a Baby.” The Practicing Midwife magazine publishes a transgender issue featuring a bearded birthing parent. Then there’s “Students of the University Schools Midwifery Program on the Management of the Penis for Birthing.”
However, Bill isn't the only one who is buzzing like a moth fluttering around a floodlight. Burr admitted that there was a possibility that things could change. “In the future, [a pregnant man is] gonna happen. Because they can already grow…an ear in a petri dish. The [stuff] that they can do is [flipping] unbelievable. So basically, when modern medicine becomes, you know, Gas Monkey Garage, and you can basically do a body-off restoration…where you're combining different eras–except you'd combine different genders–there's going to be…women pressuring their men. It used to be to get a vasectomy. Now it's going to be, ‘Why don't you get a womb? And why don't you carry this [darn] thing around?’”
It's not necessarily a mistake. In the case of the stork sticking his pollinating beak in a man's unmentionables, we're told that we must trust the experts. It is also said that those in the government know the most effective methods. Because of this, Bill's frame of reference is outdated. For all we know, males and females only make up one-third of the pie that procreates.